Submission and Passiveness
A lie we are told is:
You can run your own life; you don’t have to submit to anyone else’s authority.
This deception is one of the first fallen for, as it is one of the great deceptions that resulted in Adam and Eve’s exile from the Garden of Eden. Somehow we have perverted the call to submit, and have come to perceive it as a form of confinement, or even demeaning.
Yet, we submit every day.
We submit to the authority of our government. We submit to the rules set for us in classrooms. We do so when we followed a doctor’s orders. As children, we submit to the authority of our parents and guardians. So, why is the idea of submitting unto our spouses such an ugly concept?
It is because we are looking at it all wrong. Marital submission is not:
If it has become these things, then it is more likely that the relationship itself is unhealthy or that maybe, we are looking at things the wrong way. Just like Eve did when the serpent tempted her in the Garden.
Lies About Submission
The wife is inferior to the husband. – The Bible tells us that both man and woman, male and female, are created in the image of God. Likewise, both man and woman are subject to His redeeming grace.
Genesis 1:27 KJV (King James Version)
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
Galations 3:28 KJV (King James Version)
There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.
The husband is permitted to be harsh or dictatorial with his wife. – Husbands are commanded to love their wives in the same selfless way in which Christ loved and laid down His life for us.
Ephesians 5:25-29 KJV (King James Version)
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church
The wife is not to provide input or express her opinions to her husband. – God created woman to be a ‘helper suitable’ to her husband. In other words, he needs her help.
So when God made Eve, he made her to help Adam.
Genesis 2:18 KJV (King James Version)
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
Authority should be a means of providing spiritual cover and protection.
For the truth is, even when we may not see it, that a Higher Authority controls every human authority. Our willingness to place trust in God’s ordained authority reflects our belief in how big God really is.
Proverbs 21:1 KJV (King James Version)
The king’s heart is in the hand of the LORD, as the rivers of water: he turneth it whithersoever he will.
A common gripe wives have for their husbands is that they will not take action. This complaint is one, no doubt, Eve had in terms of Adam.
When we look back on creation, on that paradise of Eden, there is one question:
What was Adam doing when Eve was falling prey to temptation?
The only thing we do know is, he offered no interference. Adam had no involvement until Eve offered him the fruit.
This makes me wonder, was he nearby? Did he bear witness to Eve’s interaction with the serpent? It is possible, not certain, but possible.
I can recall times in my marriage that I wished my husband stepped up to say or do something. What happened when he did not? Well, to make a long story short, I took charge and more often than not…got some bad results.
Sometimes I wonder, what might have been if I had just trusted in my husband, and let God have control? Surely not what happened when I took matters into my own hands!
Does this mean my husband is to blame? Heavens no!
What does this say for us?
We must learn to wait on the Lord because in His time and His way He WILL act on our behalf if we just wait.